Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Top 10 Worst New “Words” of the 2000s.

In honor of all the jargon and buzzwords and slang that the 2000s have coined, I’m giving a shout-out to the worst. I’ve intentionally not included some of the worst offenders because they’re not actually words, but rather celebrity uni-names. So quickly, let’s all join in to hate Brangelina, Speidi, Bennifer, Bennifer II, and everyone’s favorite, TomKat. Yuk. Now, on with the show.


10. Staycation- you're either staying or you're going. Does anyone actually take days off of work, pull the kids out of school and spend all day going to museums and eating at local places they’ve never tried before? I doubt it (email me if you have, as I’m dying to meet you). So travel industry and the media, you can both stop using this word like it means something to us.


9. Misunderestimated – my favorite made-up Bush word. There are lots of others (internets – plural), but they’re all better with context. This one just stands alone. Let’s not use this again, kay. And let’s stop pronouncing Iraq as I-ROCK.


8. Bromance – I kind of understand the meaning behind this merged word (not that “bro” is a good word either), but it’s one the world can do without. There is no need to sexualize a relationship between two guy friends. They’re just friends. Got it?


7. Douche – There is some chance that this is really a late 90s word, but I’m including it on this list because it’s so terrible. There are people out there who still use this to mean someone who is lame. Please don’t, it’s actually every so slightly offensive and a little vulgar. Let’s pretend we have moved past our adolescence.


6. Synergy – This is actually my LEAST favorite business buzzword. And the list is long and the competition fierce, so you must know how much I hate it. This word means absolutely nothing and has gone from being a B-school, well-educated, trend word to being something anyone will throw around to sound cool. Listen people, you don’t sound cool, you don’t even know what synergy looks like. No one does. So stop using it.


5. Peeps – Don’t get me started on this. Please don’t say peeps. Or homies (God forbid). Just say friends. That’s what they are. You do not have a posse. You do not roll. You don’t drive an Escalade and have an entourage. You drive a Civic and communicate through Facebook. These people are not your peeps.


4. Bling – See above. And as an appendix, you do not play in the NBA, you do not have tats (number 11), and the gold-plated dollar sign necklace you’re wearing isn’t bling. It’s cheap. And tacky. And 1998. So stop.


3. ShizNit – Where in the world did this come from?? If there is anyone out there who occastionally throws out a “this is the shiznit” then please stop. Immediately.


2. Frenemy – You’re either friends. Or enemies. You can’t be both.


TIE: 1a. Snap! I hate to admit I still use this. But I’m stopping. It’s overplayed and not timeless (see Duh! circa 1997). Let’s all agree to move on to something else.


1b. Ginormous. This is repetition at it’s worst. If it’s gigantic, it’s probably enormous. I don’t really know if there’s much of a difference between the two. They’re synonyms, they both mean really big. Why on earth would we combine them to make a new word. Now we have three words that mean the same thing. If anyone can explain to me the exact size measurement difference between gigantic, enormous and ginormous, I would love to hear it.


Honorable Mentions:

Terror – Hard to fight a war on an emotion. Emotions don’t have tanks and guns, so I’m guessing we’re going to beat up on “terror” pretty quickly. Let’s use this one appropriately. K?


McMansion – I secretly “get” the reasons this word became so popular. Houses have gotten huge. But let’s give up putting Mc in front of anything. We don’t need to publicize the clown anymore than we already do.


Cougar – We are not cougars. You are not “cubs.” Do you hear me Courtney Cox??

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